Girlfriend to Wife

Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend
5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program
began unexpected child-processes that
took up a lot of space and valuable
resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself
into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as BachelorNights
10.3, Cricket 5.0, BeerWithBuddies
7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer run,
crashing the system whenever selected.
I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the
background while attempting to run my
favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to
Girlfriend 5.0, but the 'uninstall'
doesn't work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!!!

Thanks,
"A Troubled User"



REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common
problem that people complain about.

Many people upgrade from
Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking
that it is just a Utilities and
Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator
to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to
delete Wife 1.0 and to return to
Girlfriend 5.0.

It is impossible to
uninstall, or purge the program files
from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0
because Wife 1.0 is designed not to
allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0
Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child
Support) .

I recommend that you keep
Wife1.0 and work on improving the
environment.

I suggest installing the
background application "Yes Dear" to
alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is
to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE
because ultimately you will have to
give the APOLOGIZE command before the
system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it
tends to be very high maintenance.
Wife 1.0 comes with several support
programs,
such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0, Cook 1.5
and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very
careful how you use these programs.
Improper use will cause the system to
launch the program NagNag 9.5. Once
this happens, the only way to improve
the performance of Wife 1.0 is to
purchase additional software. I
recommend Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0

WARNING: DO NOT, under any
circumstances, install
SecretaryWithShortSkirt 3.3. This
application is not supported by Wife
1.0 and will cause irreversible
damage to the operating system.

PS: hehehe some part of the post is true....